Hello Just Means Hello

Fellas, here we are, deep into the autumn season.  Halloween has come and gone, the weather is cooler, sweaters are in the wardrobe rotation and intimate, close encounters with our female counterparts have taken on a new perspective.  In our quest to find a woman who suits our personality, tastes and overall zest for life, it is crucial – even mandatory, to remember one basic nugget of information in man and woman relationships.

Let’s say you cross paths with a delightful woman at a church function, at the grocery store, buying food at the farmer’s market, or where ever; and by chance for a moment she looks your way and says, “Hello” she means just that. Hello.

Do not try make this moment more than what it is because most likely you’ll either embarrass yourself or just freak her out.  If you watch the show Big Bang Theory – the character Raj lacks confidence when dealing with the fairer sex.  In one particular episode Raj was in a coffee shop, approached a woman and said “Hi”. She responded in kind but unfortunately he took that as a cue to tell her his entire life story in minutes and then out of desperation strip naked in front of her.  A pain to watch and without a moment’s hesitation the young lady ran away with the quickness.

Now we know you’re thinking to yourself that’s just television and it’s just an extreme case but too easily the above scenario can become reality if one is lacking self-assurance. If the universe for any reason beckons her to utter the word “Hello” go with a conservative approach and positive outlook – she is a nice person acknowledging your existence.  That is all, no subliminal messages or female mind games at work, she just wants to be.  Don’t be coy, say hello right back, strike up a conversation if she’s in the mood and see where it goes.

Above all else keep it simple show interest not desperation by asking engaging questions (i.e. if she was reading a book ask about that) and have a fun time . Forcing her into your zone is only a trigger for her to become tense, distrustful and ready to turn the other way.

Remember, when you next meet a woman and a “Hi” is all you get take it for what it is.  Women notice us before we realize anything concrete about the situation so take it easy and let it flow. The less you do may be the best approach for good things to develop.

Keep it smooth!

Hey, Hey….Hey Girl

Ladies, in your day-to-day travels and experiences I’m sure it is safe to say that many a guy has uttered some kind of witty, or useless line to get your attention.  Most times we genuinely want to get to know you and build a good, long-lasting relationship because we can’t always hang out with the fellas.  Also, we might take a while to get our act together (for many reasons) and let you all know that we want to be with you but we have good intentions, seriously we do.

However, there are those on the other side of the guy-hooks-up-with-girl spectrum, the ones unfortunately you woman have to deal with the most often the ones that all the relationship magazines and blogs warn about. Simply put, you are the “hey girl”. These dude have no motive other than to spit game to you, serenade you with coy phrases, handle business and then move on to the next sweetheart. You know how the flow goes, as you walk around the mall, shopping plaza or the like you hear it. “hey, hey girl let me talk to you right quick” or “hey baby, can I get some of your time” and the straight to the point “hey, let me get your number?”.

To some degree the pursuit of the fairer sex is more of a game than anything else and to be honest most guys have done this in their lifetime because we do like the “chase”. That being said, fellas there is a point in life when you have to just need to let it go. Why? Because you can’t seduce every pretty woman you ever come across and woman want a companion not a Casanova. Find a woman you can actually have a conversation with instead of seeing what lines work the best on a Friday or Saturday night. Do you really want to be hollering at a woman with tactics you used when you were 19, 20 when you are in your thirties?

So, what are some method to get a woman’s attention in a way that is mature, convincing and interesting? Her’s a quick list:

  • Start with a compliment: take notice of her style, her earrings, the way her tattoo is colored,  her nail polish color, anything a guy wouldn’t commonly mention.  Use your observation skills for other than for her curves.
  • Ask for directions: Yes, we normally don’t do this but that’s your ticket in.  You can spin a conversation out of where you’re going and ask what her favorite spots are.  Eventually ask for a date. See how it goes.
  • Food: Food brings us all together. If you’re out and the woman of your dreams is eating, be kind of slick and say something along the lines of “that looks delicious, is that your go to dish?” Strike up a convo from there.
  • Bookworm move: If you see her reading, ask her how she likes the book, what she thinks of it what other books excite her and strike up a conversation.

These are just a few suggestions but be creative and use your style to be that cool cat who knows how to talk to a woman.

Keep it smooth.

 

You wear a watch?

First and foremost, I want to apologize for my lack of posting for the past 4 weeks. I’ve been occupied to say the least. Anyway, on to the subject at hand.

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A friend of mine decided one day to fully maximize his professional look, he was going to start wearing a nice watch. I’m cool with that.

I don’t mean the cracker jack box watches, watches you win at the county fair or find at a mall kiosk. I’m talking about watches that say distinguished, professional, mature or at a minimum a watch that says, “hey I make enough money to have a watch that matches my work clothes at the office or a night out”.

Yes, we have smartphones at our disposal and can easily reach into our pockets and bags to tell the time but if you believe that’s all a watch is good for at this stage in life you’ve missed it.  A good looking watch is an iconic symbol- a symbol of confidence and class. When I started wearing a good watch the complements I would receive were a bit surprising, ladies all over me (just kidding).   That being said don’t go out and purchase the most expensive watch you feast your eyes on, work within your level. Buying a watch like Tag Heuer with 3 different chronometric dials, 1/10th of a second display, interchangable bevels and is magnetically linked to the Greenich mean time clock for $4,500 isn’t logical if you are bartender and just use your watch to tell time. However, if it is logical then more power to you!

There a several variaties of noteworthy watches that are stylistic, smooth or rugged and daring, remember the goal is to have the watch reinforce your professionalism and your own uniqueness.  You are still a cool cat with the watch on or not, the watch is just the icing on the cake.

Day to day, I wear a casual Fossil watch for work and if I hit happy hour with the fellas, cost was $100.  In some circles this may be an expensive watch but it’s rugged, sturdy looks good and if anything happens to it I send it back to Fossil and get it serviced at little to no expense. That’s the business right there! If I’m out somewhere like a dinner party, wedding or church service I’ll break out a more stylish watch because obviously I’m dressed up more than I would at work. Not necessarily a more expensive watch just more in line with my attire and the event.

Again, it’s up to you how you rock your timepiece and don’t be afraid to experiment a little and challenge yourself with a design, a color or a brand you never considered.  With the spring weather those wrists will be exposed more often do them a favor a get a nice watch on them.

The Almighty Hat

I have reconnected with the supreme stylings, the elegant contours of headwear. Sorry to disappoint some but the headwear discussed will not include ball caps, beanies or wave caps (for real, dudes still wear those?).  There is a time and place for them but I’m taking about mature hats.  I won’t go into detail about the different hat styles, methods of wearing a hat, storage, coordination of hat so on and so forth.  That will be for another post in the future instead I’ll speak on why a guy needs a good hat.  Picture this if you will, going out to dinner with your lady and you all are heading to a nice restaurant, movie and walk around the town. You get dressed to impress, slacks on, of course. Button up shirt and tie, indeed. Dress shoes looking sharp and clean, yes.  Coat on, you bet. Ready to go and enjoy the movie.  Whoa, hold up now.  Missing ingredient, and I missed it for years.

The hat is the centerpiece, the icing on the cake of your wardrobe. The one accessory a man wears that is immediately noticed and gives a glimpse of your uniqueness.  It adds an element of cool and compliments your outfit to give it extra presence.  Think of it this way, you can eat world-class gourmet pancakes or waffles without maple syrup/honey/agave if you want to but you won’t.  You can have a 5-star rated salad without the dressing but you won’t. Why? Because the honey, syrup and salad dressing add flavor and character to the overall experience.  That is what a good hat will do.  It will add flavor and character, the hat will bring out the distinguished classy appearance and enhance an already excellent outfit. At a minimum it will keep your head warm while you look good.

A good hat will let your persona shine through and women know a man who can wear a hat has that confidence.  I typically go with a fedora or kangol but you’ll find what works for you.  As mentioned earlier there will be a post on the different hat styles and the ways to wear a hat.  Once you take that step to embrace the almighty hat it is game over and you’ll be winning.